What is the all-time funniest comment on the List Universe?

[Randall]

OKAY.... I can't blame you if you're busy with sex. I take MY time too, with that. Of course, if you're just pleasuring yourself, you know... you can do that anytime. Like me---in the office, when I'm driving, after dinner, before dinner, during breakfast...

uhhh... not right now, of course. Nah. Not at all. ahem.

(serious note, no---I'll never nominate myself).

[segue]

astraya! Even I can't come up with a comparison between tofu and sex, except that I dearly love both.
My husband and I add cubes of tofu to any soup we make, and it always makes the soup better. Of course, this comes from someone who loves edamame, too. Perhaps my taste buds are too eclectic for this discussion.

[deziner]

While catching up on the comments to the Firearms list, I came across this retort...(Not a complete quote of the original post)

#650--US Marine (in repose)

".........
I can help! You sir, are a dick salesman with a mouth full of samples.

......"

I still laugh when reading it...

[astraya]

My last look at sex:

Some comments were randomly unclassifiable (or unclassifiably random)

46 chubbmeister
Hahaha, the picture for number 2, that’s exactly what my dad and I used to do when I was a kid! WHEEEEEEE!!
(ehh, that is not sex for fun of course, just the launching part)

23 Travis
8: The thought of using animal intestini for sex freaks me out… what about the smell?

63 zuh
c’mon now, don’t you know know that sausage is encased in animal intestine? of course, after reading this list, we can now interpret that in more ways than one…

73 Maximuz04
about the headache… i dunno ive had sex with someone who had a headache and they ended up throwing up. However they were rather drunk so i dunno if thats different LoL!

74 Maggot - Report Abuse
Maybe “headache” and “drunk” had nothing to do with it.

99 iknownothing
“sex cures headaches” my ex said so does a good nights sleep

107 bigun
It makes your dick hard.

[Meg Ryan: Yes! Yes!! YESSSS!!!!
Rob Reiner's mother: I'll have what she's having]

[What's next? That's right, penises. I can't get enough of a good thing. Hang on - please don't misinterpret that!]

[astraya]

While I'm procrastinating on penises and soup

Top 10 modern addictions [or are they really just obsessions?]

72 FelixMG
FIRST!!

I’m addicted to being late, and wrong. And stupid.

[and deeply self-perceptive]

75 crispin
Where’s heroine? Now THAT’S an addiction!

[Yeah, Clarice Starling, Ellen Ripley, Lara Croft - just can't get enough of 'em!]

[deziner]

Aw Randall, I must clean my monitor yet again.....

From the recent Audacious Shoot-outs list.....( just an excerpt)

Comment #114

"..............And your statistical witches brew there makes about as much sense as a lizard in a bowl of tomato soup........"

[Trigun472]

I don't know if it's 'the all-time funniest', but I think Randall's story on the LV Book announcement deserves nomination for 'Most Entertaining Comment'.

[DK]

I don't know if it's 'the all-time funniest', but I think Randall's story on the LV Book announcement deserves nomination for 'Most Entertaining Comment'.

Agreed!

[deziner]

Not any one particular comment, but today's list about the Nobel peace prize has given us a new term, adopted by quite a few commenters.....

The Dunderheaded Coconut.

Yeah! Let's see if this one can reach a level of notoriety that can stand with BAJ.

[astraya]

Ghost stories

98 hartwickky
shut up maggot

99 Maggot
Make me, fuckwad.

105 ianz09
Maggot, Maggot! Back off him dude, he’s my designated hater! If I’m going to be even half of what Randall is, I need that little prick! ... Don’t scare him off, I need a little fucker to give me negative attention, but attention nonetheless. Gosh.

127 Maggot
If I’m going to be even half of what Randall is, I need that little prick!
You know, there’s a number of ways I could go with this comment ...

[segue]

I was always told that men never, but never, use the words "little" and "prick" together. Am I wrong??

[astraya]

They say that virginity is like a balloon - one little prick and it's all gone.

[segue]

Trust me,astraya, from a womans point of view, you want the first time to big the biggest prick you can find. A little prick is never going to get the job done!

[BooRadley]

Another gem from Shifty in the games forum's "Word Chains:"

"mongoose - the other gray meat"

[astraya]

Trust me,astraya, from a womans point of view, you want the first time to big the biggest prick you can find. A little prick is never going to get the job done!

But if you lose your virginity to the biggest prick you can find, he'll tell everyone! (And you're probably not important to him.)

[astraya]

The Dunderheaded Coconut.

I just googled for that. Unfortunately not original. One of the many epithets hurled by Captain Haddock from the Tintin comics. I won't prick the balloon of the original commenter, though.

[segue]

saith astraya on Sat Nov 07, 2009 11:02 pm

"But if you lose your virginity to the biggest prick you can find, he'll tell everyone! (And you're probably not important to him.)"

The first one is never important. It's "Let's get this over with so we can have fun with it from now on!"

[deziner]

The Dunderheaded Coconut.

I just googled for that. Unfortunately not original. One of the many epithets hurled by Captain Haddock from the Tintin comics. I won't prick the balloon of the original commenter, though.

Coincidentally I was recently at a Tintin blogsite that had an index of Captain Haddock epithets.....He has some true charmers. It would be cool if more commenters would steal a few of them, instead of some of the unoriginal potty-mouth that some folks deem acceptable for a public site.

[astraya]

Mail deliveries

165 ianz09
Boy oh boy do FUCKING love Randall. You have NO idea. Can you imagine how much money I would pay to switch spots with his lady friend? God DAMN, Randall is like Jesus’s older, cooler brother. I have a Randall shrine in my closet. Doesn’t everyone?! Hand me a towel someone, all the sarcasm is dripping on me.

[RandomPrecision]

targeted mass killings - as it used to be...

Jamie caught me off-guard with this one: "You can speak as much in favor of killing children as you like"


and then,
85. Zamp: Do you classify chicken eggs as chickens? No, because there is a distinct identification of what is a chicken and what it isn’t. Although the egg is a crucial part of what makes a delicious fried chicken, I’m not about to stop eating eggs benedicts in misguided moralities on the prospect of more fried chicken.